The MicroStrategy Massacre ------------------------------- Monday, August 24, 2026 Bitcoin trades at $350,000. MicroStrategy holds 876,091 BTC, worth $307B. Joe Kernen grins at Saylor on CNBC: “Michael, are you going for a Nakamoto — one million coins?” The question lingers. Saylor smiles, his eyes gleaming. In the background, the B1M app pings: “Power Law confirmed. $1M BTC by 2033.” The world is convinced. Sovereigns nibble, hedge funds chase. Nobody imagines the cost of flying this close to the sun. Friday, September 11, 2026 Enter Josh Mandell. MicroStrategy’s new Chief Product Officer, an ex-Salomon Brothers quant with a taste for sci-fi. On Becky Quick’s morning show, he unveils STRX: a $40B “super-convertible” — part bond, part equity, part Bitcoin-linked derivative. Priced at 92 cents on the dollar, with a 4% coupon and a “Bitbond kicker”: an extra 6% payout every time Bitcoin breaks a new $100K level. Mandell grins: “It’s like time travel. We’re borrowing from the future...
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